More unhappy bowel stories - be forewarned

There's nothing quite as shocking or upsetting as going to the bathroom and finding something you don't expect emerge from you. Especially if it comes with pain and extreme discomfort.

In my case, I started peeing blood a couple of days ago.

Horrible, horrible, horrible.

I hadn't been feeling well most of the afternoon, and I knew something funky was going on down there, and by late in the evening it was obvious.

I called Telehealth and they recommended I see a doctor right away, even if it meant going to the emergency room, which I really wasn't going to do since my sister's experience a couple of months back.

I went to Mount Sinai in the morning, was there for about two and a half hours, and it was pretty much what everyone suspected: urinary tract infection. Eeew. I was still peeing bits of blood clots here and there, and I was plenty uncomfortable, so they gave me some FANTASTIC painkillers and an antibiotic. The painkillers look just like mini brown M & Ms and turn my pee orange, while the antibiotics are black and yellow capsules that turn my pee brown. So now I've got funky coloured pee and I'm all tripped out on these FANTASTIC painkillers that make me dizzy and headachey and generally very floaty. Wheee!

I should mention the Mount Sinai emergency room was much nicer and cleaner than Toronto Western Hospital's emergency ward. I've been told that Toronto General Hospital has a brand-spanking new ER, so the next time one of the So family has to go to, that's where we'll head. That should be in about, oh, two, three months.

The weirdest thing about Mt. Sinai: the emergency ward is named the Schwartz/Reisman ER, after the power couple Gerry and Heather. The sick thing: there's a mini-Indigo inside the hospital! It's called Indigo! Spirit and sells flowers, best selling books, stuffed animals, and the kind of stuff that you'd get in your usual hospital gift shop. So how do you think the two agreed to make the "charitable" donation to build the ER? "Oh we'll fund the renovation, but in return, we want to put a store we can make money with inside...."

Geez.