Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Class up the ass

I was at the Dollarama at Dufferin Mall the other day when I spotted two girls, maybe 12 or 13 years old, trying to steal stuff. I was the only person in the aisle with them, and it was obvious they were waiting for me to leave, but I didn't. I just kept looking over at them, waiting for them to try to stuff their goddamn ugly Dora the Explorer backpacks with handfuls of trinkets.

I was about to say something. I thought, "This is an opportunity to teach them a lesson." I could take them out, sit them down for a cup of coffee, then ask them "WTF? Don't you guys have something better to do?"

Then I realized, hell, they're stealing from a DOLLAR STORE. If they can't bring themselves to actually commit a real crime, or screw someone that deserves to be screwed, then hell, they deserve to have that really embarrassing note on their criminal records that says they stole from a freakin' Dollarama.

It was obvious they'd done this kind of thing before, too. Girls, wherever you are, here's what I would have told you: Karma's a bitch. When you're getting your teeth knocked in by mall security for trying to filch a Sony MP3 player, just remember that had you only done it before the age of majority, you wouldn't have gotten your asses kicked so bad because you were only children back then.

Also, one of you is going to get hit by a car - the other will lose the ring and index finger on her right hand after her boyfriend's dog bites it off. I'm just sayin'.

Wednesday, March 22, 2006


The new season of Avatar: The Last Airbender has begun airing on the Nickelodeon network. So far, I've wrangled my boyfriend, my sister, and her husband into the show, and they've managed to swing two others into it as well. I WILL succeed in converting the rest of you... but I think a lot of people visitng me now came here from (where my fics are hosted) or from my Live Journal entries. Hi!

The links below go to my favourite Avatartist of all time, Isaia, a.k.a. aviaq on LJ. She's just got this beautiful cartoon style that makes the characters really believably human, and there's just so much energy behind each of her works. And she's funny, to boot.

Someone, SOMEONE give this girl a job at Nickelodeon!

Because I'm apparently Avatarded:

It's Avatarded if Part 1:
It's Avatarded if Part 2:
It's Avatarded if Part 3:
It's Avatarded if Part 4:
It's Avatarded if Part 5:

And to think she's just going into college. Check out even more of her fun and absolutely gorgeous and hilarious Avatar and non-Avatar art at:


Ways to waste time #754: the Song Tapper.

Got a tune stuck in your head but have no idea what it is? Tap out the rhythm of the song on your keyboard and the site will come up with a list of songs that could match.

Via Xiao Pangzi.

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Big city, little city

I've been freelancing for a new website,, which is a Toronto-based business search engine that is built upon reviews, pictures, and tags from the community. As I review all the stores, restaurants and services I know, starting with my own neighbourhood in the Annex, I begin to realize just how huge this city is, and how little I know about it.

I realize I pass the same store every day, but have never gone in. I realize I've never noted the names of some of my favourite stores and restaurants. I realize there are dozens of missed opportunities because I've never simply steeled my resolve and just stepped into a store to explore and sate a curiosity that has never been piqued.

And then I realize that some stores just don't warrant entering because of bad marketing. Boring displays, old merchandise, sloppy, dirty storefronts, and so on just don't inspire me to walk in and say, hmm, I wonder if they have anything I could buy...

Weird how that works.

Monday, March 20, 2006

Sunday, March 19, 2006

Gastro-post ahead!

As I sit in the throes of lactose intolerance, my stomach gurgling and singing and making me burp up my latest meal, I read Carly's baby blog and feel oh so much better. Not just because she has confirmed all my deepest fears about the physicality of having children, but also because I know that somewhere out there, there is someone whose stomach was a little worse off than mine.

... Okay, a lot. In any case, Carly, I do not envy you your motherly trials, but you are an inspiration to us all. Give my love to the puppy and the parasite (aka Lucy).

P.S. Chocolate milk and popcorn don't mix. Well, they do, under non-lactose-intolerant circumstances. You have been warned.

Saturday, March 18, 2006

V for Vendetta

So I caught the 7:10 pm show on opening night.

I really enjoyed the graphic novel, despite the how dark, verbose, and depressing it was, but I still say go read it before you see the movie. For one, it does translate quite well to screen. The Wachowski brothers managed to pare down the character relationships and plot enough so it all came across as simply the idea and message. Much of the dialogue is lifted straight from the book, and is beautifully delivered by masked vigilante Hugo Weaving, whose opening alliterative monologue was spectacularly given.

Weaving's performance overall was wonderful; he manages to perform beyond the smiling Guy Fox mask and exhibit a full range of emotions by body language alone.

Natalie Portman also does a bang up job as Evey, though compared to the graphic novel SPOILER ALERT version, I don't see much transition from frightened little girl to fearless revolutionary. I think it's the eyes - too much mascara. Still, her performance was good, and I give her kudos for shaving her head for the part.

Go see this movie. It's great.

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Get crackin'


Sculptures. Made entirely of eggs. Neato.
But, as my brother-in-law would say, what a waste of eggs!

Wednesday, March 15, 2006


We're having four new windows installed in the house. One of them is in my room.
As a result, the house is now freezing - we've turned the heat off while the workers do the installation. The thermostat reads a balmy 16 degrees celcius (about 61 farenheit or 289 Kelvins, for you nerds out there.) But it also happens to be one of the windiest days in memory. So with the windchill, my living room feels like minus 30 C.

Fun. I am currently wearing 3 sweaters and two pairs of pants, plus both of my hoodies are drawn up and I'm wearing my spiffy new fuzzy blue gloves that Catherine gave me. They make my hands look like Cookie Monster's, or possible Grover's. It's hard to type with such fat, muppet-like digits, I tell ya.

I find myself drifting off into hibernation mode, but I have nowhere warm to be and no bed to lie down on. Not even the couch. Not that I'm complaining - these guys are getting the windows done pretty fast. Still... brr.

On a side note, because this blog is all about wasting time and learning trivial matters, the best way to get warm is to strip naked and climb into a sleeping bag with someone else who is already naked.

John, I'm looking in your direction.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Spaaaaahh... ow ow OW!

There's nothing quite like having your back rubbed until you're sore and bruised so that you can really appreciate how much strain you put on your body while sitting on your ass.

So I went to get a much needed massage today to work the stress-induced stiffness out of my spine, shoulders and neck. What never ceases to amaze me is the amount of pressure on the upper portion of my glutes - a condition I shall henceforth call computer butt.

Ask yourself: do I have computer butt? What are the symptoms of computer butt? How can I prevent computer butt? How do I get rid of computer butt?

1) Do I have computer butt?
If you spend more than 2 hours a day at your computer, or sitting at a desk, the chances are, you have computer butt.

2) Symptoms:
Numbness of the general ass area, noticable widening, flatness, or sagginess; in severe cases, pain, sores, hemorrhoids, melting, oozing, permanent ass grooves in office chair, paralysis or disappearance of legs.

3) Prevention:
Get away from your desk. If that's not possible, eschew chairs altogether and stand at your workstation. Don't sit. Ever.

4) Getting rid of computer butt:
Machete and an iron will. Or, massage therapy. Implants are also an option.

Monday, March 13, 2006

Yellow Fever

If you haven't already seen this, you should, especially if you're an Asian girl dating a white guy.
Aw heck, it's funny even if you're an Asian girl and aren't dating a white guy.

Home base

Day one of my hiatus:
Got up, ate breakfast, worked on writing some reviews for, painted the basement, ate lunch, folded laundry, played Katamari Damancy (damn addictive game), had someone over to fix my computer (and now it's in the shop), and now I'm blogging... ahh...

On the one hand, I feel like I should be doing more, like I should be going out to get some exercise and fresh air.

But it's raining and cold and there are wolves after me.

Besides, the shoulds of the world will kill us all. Yeah, I should be volunteering my free time to help the needy, I should be working a dead-end job so I can save money to buy a house and procreate to spread my genes... but TV and video games makes it so easy not to do any of that stuff.

Will probably spend more time writing and reading today - I still have to finish reading Eragon and lots of other books I have stocked up on my shelves. Meanwhile, Job Quest continues, though I'm not eager to put myself back into a cubicle anytime soon.

Yep, so that's what I'm doing... *putting my feet up* ... yyyyuuuuuppp...

Saturday, March 11, 2006


I've quit my job.
Don't tell my parents.

I'd been thinking about it for some time now, and I decided the office life wasn't for me. So I cast off the shackles of my indentured life and decided to freelance for a while. Reclaim my identity, take some time off, and not have sleepless nights where I end up in fetal position, wide-eyed, whispering and singing crazily to myself.

Today is day one. I have done little today, except watch cartoons, play We Love Katamari, and a little bit of cleaning that proved to be utterly futile since the vacuum cleaner seems to be blowing out more dust than it's sucking in.

So expect to see more posts from here on in... not that I'll have a lot to say, but you don't come here for intellectual stimulus anyhow, so I'll try not to hurt your brains too much.