We had gathered to celebrate my sister Fiona's 30th birthday (happy bday, older-not-bigger!) and were discussing her natal day, the freak winter storm that closed Toronto schools that April 4th in 1975, and subsequently the birth dates of my younger sister, Jenny (hang in there, kiddo, school's almost done!) and my own.
Granma (Dad's mom) arrived from Hong Kong on the day of my birth just hours before my mother went into labour with me. Once she was in the hospital and my father had settled my Granma in at home, he got the call. "We had a girl," Mom said.
"Hey Ma," Dad yelled to Granma in Cantonese, "We had another girl. What should we call her?"
My Granma shot my Dad a look as if it were obvious.
"Number Two, of course!" she said.
My Chinese name, So Sik Yee, means "great, plentiful and suitable." Great. Now I can finally add the word "poo" to that particular descriptor.
Man, I always knew I was a great big heaping pile of shit.
Thanks Granma. And subsequently, thanks for fattening me up and chasing me all around the house with spoonfuls of food whenever you were bored. Now I'm a shapely lemon of a girl with bright yellow skin and great big birthing hips. THANKS.
Dad said that before she went back, she really wanted to see me take my first steps. Only I was too fat to stand upright. I think the sound he made at the dinner table to illustrate this point was: "BAL-LUMBP!"
See, Granma? That's what you get for making such a fey-fey-dey (fatty-fat) kid!
(Granma died more than a decade ago...I never met her, but really folks, I am grateful. Please don't kill me Dad.)
No comments:
Post a Comment