There's nothing quite like having your back rubbed until you're sore and bruised so that you can really appreciate how much strain you put on your body while sitting on your ass.
So I went to get a much needed massage today to work the stress-induced stiffness out of my spine, shoulders and neck. What never ceases to amaze me is the amount of pressure on the upper portion of my glutes - a condition I shall henceforth call computer butt.
Ask yourself: do I have computer butt? What are the symptoms of computer butt? How can I prevent computer butt? How do I get rid of computer butt?
1) Do I have computer butt?
If you spend more than 2 hours a day at your computer, or sitting at a desk, the chances are, you have computer butt.
2) Symptoms:
Numbness of the general ass area, noticable widening, flatness, or sagginess; in severe cases, pain, sores, hemorrhoids, melting, oozing, permanent ass grooves in office chair, paralysis or disappearance of legs.
3) Prevention:
Get away from your desk. If that's not possible, eschew chairs altogether and stand at your workstation. Don't sit. Ever.
4) Getting rid of computer butt:
Machete and an iron will. Or, massage therapy. Implants are also an option.
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