I'm turning into a bitter old woman. Christmas sucks. Not the whole birth of Christ thing, but the thing this "joyful season" has turned into. It's not joyful. Look around: everyone's SOOOO stressed out!
I was at a Dominion's, and it was packed with people picking up groceries. An old man and his wife were driving their cart around and they tried to move it through an aisle and another family was trying to get through at the same time, and the old man FREAKED OUT and his wife was yelling at him about him ripping her coat (I dunno, I think the cart snagged it or something) and he demanded they go home. "Let's go home! Right now!" He yelled at her. And she didn't budge.
Awwwk-waaaard...
I just want to go over there and hug him till I broke a few ribs and sing "Merry Christmas, Mr. Scrooge!" And then break his face.
The stress is electric, I tell ya. It doesn't help that people are jostling and frowning and yelling and being overly sensitive. I mean, really, dose it matter that much that your father-in-law ISN'T going to get that tie he's never going to wear?
Remember how last year on boxing day, half the world woke up underwater? How thousands of men, women, and children were crushed by sluices of water followed by the debris of their lives? How we all watched in horror as thousands of bodies were washed away, into the ocean, never to be named, counted, blessed, or buried?
And closer to home, I might add that New Orleans is STILL underwater, and there's not a damn thing we or the thousands of displaced Americans can do about it (here! have some bottled water!)
Sigh. What do we really want from Christmas, anyhow? I swear, one of these days someone's going to pick up on the fact that there's no love in the holidays anymore, and he/she'll go to the mall armed to the teeth, and start firing into the crowd.
BANG BANG.
What do YOU want for Christmas?
How about my fiance's life back?
Or my mother's eyesight?
Or my kid's legs?
Sorry, Santa's only got an iPod Nano and some Starbucks gift certificates left. Oh, and a bath set.
Shucks, well, maybe I can get it on Boxing Day.
Sorry, no refunds or exchanges.
Fuck, Christmas is so depressing.
1 comment:
I felt like this a few years ago and I've made some changes that make me feel better about Christmas:
1. Avoid shopping in the month of December or at least, avoid malls. In regards to shopping in the supermarket, go when there are the least amount of people.
2. Don't buy gifts for people you dislike. Or at least, give them a hint of your dislike by re-gifting the gift they gave you last year.
3. Skip seeing people you dislike. Create excuses like you need to work overtime or create situations where you can't possibly see them, like a trip to Beijing or Switzerland.
4. Make plans to see people you do like.
It's not easy to implement some of these changes, especially with all the family pressure. But once you get over the false guilt, your homicidal urges should subside.
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