Your epidermis is showing

A little over a month ago, I wrote about getting some new skin care products to help with my gently ageing face. A month later, I can't exactly attest to the effectiveness of this $72 combination of cleanser, toner and face cream.

On the one hand, these tiny amount seem to last and last. I don't need much cream to cover my skin as it spreads quite evenly, but part of me thinks it's because I'm subconsciously being stingy about the amount I use. At $35 for face cream, I'd have to make it last almost nine months when compared to my usual facial diet of Hazeline Snow.

My cheeks seem to be a little less dry, but I don't know if that's because the worst of winter is over. I'm still getting dry skin flare ups where my cheeks break out into almost rashy patches of itchiness, and some days this stuff BURNS (but not consistently, so what gives?) I don't have any allergies, so I'm assuming the flare ups are part of my feminine cycle or else a change in the weather.

Conclusion: I'm not paying $72 again for products that aren't making a significant difference.

What I will pay for is this: Udderly Smooth Udder Cream. I crap you not, I saw this in the pharmacy section of Loblaws and said to myself, "If it's good enough for cow udders, it's good enough for my hands!"

The instructions on the jar aren't even geared toward humans:

"Apply to udder after each milking, massaging into the skin. For teat cracks apply in sufficient quantity to fill crack and cover surrounding area."

If that's not a selling feature to appeal to those of us with teats, I don't know what could sell it.

At $6.69 for 12 oz., I figure at least I'm getting my money's worth pound for pound. And it beats paying $14 for the1.7 oz. of Bigelow chapped hands remedy I've been using, which helped with my super itchy chardonnay-making hands, but doesn't last since I reapply almost every hour.

Worst case scenario: I grow black and white spots and chew more before swallowing.

I'll keep you posted as my skin sloughs off for spring.