No props to Prop 8

Gee, thanks, California, for harshing the buzz. WTF?

You just elected a black president. But God forbid you let the personal lives of loving couples who happen to be of the same gender ruin your ultra-heterosexual, straight-edge lifestyle. I mean, since when did you insist on looking into your neighbors' bedrooms and insisting your rights as someone who isn't as happy are being infringed upon?

Oh, sure, marriage is a sacred union between blah blah blah. You wanna explain the high divorce rate, then? I'm sure God won't have any problem with you defying your own rules.

Forget that you are directly challenging the rights of human beings. Forget that at one point in history it is likely that you, too, were or would have been discriminated against based on your heritage, your color, your gender, your religion, your identity. Forget that you are setting a dangerous precedent for retracting the basic civil liberties of an identifiable group.

You know, since we're already at it, why don't we suggest a proposition to, hmm, say, take away the voting rights of those uppity womenfolk? Or maybe we should amend the rules to make sure blacks are only counted as 3/5 a person and legalize slavery again. And let's get rid of those pesky child labor laws, because we all know our kids are all fat, lazy slobs. Oh, and let's make sure those uppity Jews, Irishmen, and Orientals aren't allowed into the country. Because God knows we have too many of them around.

Give me a break, people. If someone's lifestyle bothers you that much, don't be their friend. In fact, be loud about it so the rest of us can make sure not to sit with you in the lunchroom, because heaven knows we don't want to infringe on your cloistered, phobic, personal breathing space--it reeks of desperation, fear, and utter self-worthlessness.

I, personally, am putting together a proposition to ensure stupid people wear signs that declare their status as morons. And maybe we should make them wear armbands and ship them off to concentration camps, too....