Sunday, September 18, 2011

Mad Men: Don Draper in the First Three Episodes of the First Season

I'm Don Draper! I'm dashing and handsome, with well tailored suits, ice-blue eyes that will stop your heart and freeze your soul, and a chin cleft you can strike a match on. Look at my lover! Isn't she hot? Check out my office! It's swank and we drink and smoke and sexually harass the womenfolk all the time. Not only that, but I've got a beautiful house in the suburbs, a beautiful wife and two kids. Weren't the fifties great?

(But deep down inside, I don't know who I am or what I want or why I'm here. You can tell because I start to talk more slowly when I go too deep into my dark thoughts, and my eyes go all shimmery.)

Check me out while I be all debonair for this sexy ice-queen lady and put her in a compromising position. She totally deserved to be put in her place for pulling that strong-woman bullshit at the meeting.

(Inside, I'm dying...grasping for what, I don't know.)

My wife is hot, and she's mine, and I know she'll never be displeased with me, which is why I get away with all kinds of shit.

(I want to die.)

Look, honey, a puppy!

(I'm drunk.)

I'm sure this show will get better, according to everyone around me. But if the Draper is going to be this self-centered throughout the series, I think I might have a hard time stomaching it.

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